Day One

Wow, it’s been a minute. I think I last wrote in February when I was taking a month off work. That was awesome. Before catching you up on everything that’s happened in the last few months, I need to tell you about the current state of things.

Surprisingly, I haven’t gotten married. Sad, right? Kidding, not sad at all. But I did do something a bit different for me. For the last five months I’ve been dating a 22 year old. After only dating older guys for my entire life, I decided to change things up. I kind of got tired of all the baggage and drama with the older dudes so I put no limitations on my dating app age range. And wow, that was interesting.

I don’t think I actually thought I’d go out with anyone that young, but then this dude messaged me. He’s an athlete in college and wanted to know more about swimming. He seemed cute and nice and very British, which I loved. I don’t think either of us expected us to date for very long, let alone for five months, but it was fun, easy, and so chill. Probably just what I needed. Anyway, he’s going back to London and we ended things. We’re still friends on very good terms, but we want different things in life AND HE’S ONLY 22! He doesn’t need to be hanging around with this old lady. Damn.

Soooooo…the relationship with this dude made me realize a lot of things about myself, which I think was good. I spoke to my therapist about some of the things and she said that I probably needed take a one year break from dating. A ONE YEAR BREAK. Damn.

I don’t think she’s wrong, but wow. She told me that a couple of months ago and since then I’ve deleted all the dating apps and just kind of waited for this relationship to end – which happened yesterday. And now I’ve officially made it through day 1 of no dating.

I’m saying that I’m one day clean and sober from dudes. And I’m looking forward to the next 364 days. Or however long it takes for me to deal with my sh*t. Obviously, if someone comes into my life and they’re everything I’ve ever wanted/needed, fine, I’ll go out with them, but I’m not pursuing dating and I think that’s so important.

In the meantime, I’m still working, swimming, and doing a bit of traveling. I’m most excited about competing in my first Masters Artistic Swimming competition, which is happening next month. I’m very nervous and we’re training hard. I haven’t been this physically challenged in a really long time and I’m really looking forward to it.

And because there were so many words in this post, here’s a picture for you:

That was from Sunday at my sister’s Pints & Paint event for her nonprofit. HAPPY PRIDE 🌈 🌈 🌈

Posted in Dating | 2 Comments

A Taste of Retirement

Last summer, my job offered comp time if I worked an extra day a week. My regular work schedule is Tuesday through Friday, 10 hours per day. I decided to work an additional 10 hours on Mondays so I could accrue more time off. And then I decided that I wanted to take February off. Best idea ever.

I’ve taken a lot of time off from work before, but I usually travel. I think I went to Thailand for five weeks and Guatemala for four weeks, but this time, I wanted to stay home. That’s probably pretty weird because we’ve been forced to stay home for a couple of years now, but I really like being home and have never really done a staycation sort of thing. Anyway, what I’ve realized is that I think I was meant for retirement.

And now I need to figure out how to make this a permanent thing. One of the reasons I wanted to stay home was so I could keep swimming. I’m really trying to increase my strength so I asked one of my coaches to write some workouts for me. And omfg, they are so difficult. Damn.

Then, the Raindrops had another gig, which was so fun!

I love getting a good angle on a photo 😳🔥🤣!

If you follow me on other social media, you saw that I posted some other wedding pics from wedding #2 in 2020. I thought I should share them here too! The smoke in the top picture is from J, who was holding a smoke bomb. In the bottom picture, I’m carrying a cake box that had cupcakes in it. I love everything about that pic. It was taken at the very end of the photo session when my dress weighed about 300 pounds because it was soaking wet. And the sand. OMFG, the sand.

Another kind of weird/random thing – I had my portrait hanging in the world locally famous Powell’s books!

A local artist had a bunch of her artwork on display for the entire month of January. So cool. And guess who else had their dumb face on display?

Yep, dumb George. We went together to check it all out. #exesandfriends #exhusbandsarethebesthusbands

For the next 2.5 weeks, I’m going to work on figuring out how to retire ASAP because this is really the way to live. Let me know if you have any ideas (that don’t involve pyramid schemes, a likelihood of incarceration, or becoming an escort). Thanks, you peeps are the best!

Posted in Creatures, Friends, Sports, Trophy Husband, Uncategorized, Weirdness, Workout | 1 Comment

New Year…New Marriage?

Haha, just kidding. No f*cking way. Well, I shouldn’t say “no f*cking way” because life is hilarious and weird sh*t happens all the time, but right now, I don’t see any marriages happening in 2022. Woohoo!

And so far, 2022 has been pretty awesome. I don’t know if I’ve written about it before, but in 2020, I joined a masters artistic (formerly called synchronized) swimming team. It has been the most fun thing I’ve done in probably decades. I was a competitive synchronized swimmer as a kid (from ages 8 to 13), but then we moved and I stopped. I went back to it about 27 years later. And love it so much!

Anyway, we have swimmers from ages 20-something to 77! We practice twice per week and these ladies are just my favorite. If you want to see some of our practice swims, I’ve added a highlight to my Instagram profile (@the_marni)! I’m also part of a performance troupe, The Rose City Raindrops, and we were recently hired for an event (the first since before COVID). I finally got to get all dressed up to swim:

We swam a team routine (10 swimmers) and then we each choreographed and swam a duet with someone who doesn’t swim. It was hilarious.

My duet partner was such a good sport and we had a lot of fun swimming our routine…and no one drowned! #success #futureolympians

Let’s see, what else? I’m still dating. It’s a total sh*t show…and I’m really into it. I’ve never dated for fun, without having some goal in mind (like dumb marriage) so it is very different. And WAY better…at least for now. No pressure.

Oh and little Tot is just doing the best. He still goes to daycare a couple of days a week and they send me report cards with pictures of him. OMG, I die. I just die.

He’s just the happiest little nightmare dog.

Happy New Year and I hope 2022 brings you all the amazing things!

Posted in Creatures, Dating, Weirdness, Workout | 1 Comment