To read Part One of this recap, click here.
So my friends made a profile for me on Tinder. This was easy, swipe left, swipe right, get a match and then message each other. That first night, both of my friends played on my account, swiping left and right based on who the f*ck knows what. Later, I matched with some of the guys and I had no idea why. I asked the girls and they would say things like, “he had a cute dog!” I love dogs, yes, but that’s wasn’t really a good reason for me to go out with someone or even talk to them. Oh and when we first set up that account, I think we set my age range for men from 35 to 55 (I was wrong about both numbers).
Initially, I got a lot of matches (probably because my friends swiped right on a lot of guys), and actually within 24 hours, I had a date. I was so freaked out and nervous, I can’t believe I even went out with him. And the poor guy had to suffer through a date with me. I kind of used it as my opportunity to find out all about the dating world. Like an interview to join this world I knew nothing about. He was great and I really liked him. I was really honest with him and it probably freaked him out (I was still living with G at the time) and really had no idea what I was doing on a date. We had a lot in common (both went to law school, both middle children, around the same age, no kids!). We texted for a long time after and met up again, but it wasn’t anything major.
I also had a few weirdo dates, which helped me decide to change my age range a bit. One guy was waaaaaaaaaaay too interested and he lied about his age. He was more than 20 years older than me and wouldn’t tell me his age before we met up. The date was fine, but no thank you. Another guy seemed to try to dazzle me with his money, but he was also a lot older than me and refused to tell me his height before we met up. And as much as I’d like to say I’d date/marry someone for their money, I just don’t think that’s the case. So back to this guy’s height, I’m kind of tall (5’8), but I didn’t have that listed on my profile. I had a feeling that this guy was shorter so I asked him how tall he is (in a nice way, saying that I’m tall and some guys don’t like a woman towering over them) and he wouldn’t answer the question, he just said he didn’t mind that I’m tall. And then when I met him, I felt like a gigantic person (in both height and weight), which is not my thing. G isn’t the tallest guy, but I didn’t feel like I was towering over him (we’re about the same height, although he thinks he’s taller). Anyway, didn’t see that guy again. And I actually ghosted him, which I still feel bad about today. I quickly learned that honesty really is the best policy and it’s best to say, “I’m just not that into you.”
Overall, I met some great guys and didn’t really have any bad experiences. The most difficult part for me was ending a date. I can talk a lot, about nothing or everything. And I think I do this bad thing where I can make someone feel like I like them, even when I don’t. Most of my dates were hours long, even when I knew from the start that I wasn’t into the guy. Ugh, it made it difficult because the guy would get the wrong idea and that’s when the ghosting or I’m-not-that-into-you-convo would happen. But overall, it was really great to meet all of the guys and I think it probably has to do with the fact that I didn’t really have any expectations. I wasn’t looking to get married or have kids, just for someone to go out with, really. There were other requirements…like a job (hopefully a good one), a love for travel, someone who’s independent and who is ambitious, someone who has their own life.
I stopped my Tinder swiping after I pretty much swiped left on everyone and stopped getting matches. I heard about OkCupid from my boss (of all people) and he had met his fiance on it. My first question about it was, “is it free?” Obviously, the most important question. It was, so I signed up. And that was amazing. ANYONE can send you a message and that was just about the biggest ego-boost of my life. I think I’d set my age range to something like 38 to 50 and I had 20 year olds asking if I’d date a younger guy. Thanks, but no thanks. Maybe when I’m 60. The profiles on OkCupid have a lot more information and you can answer a million questions about yourself. I didn’t do much of a profile and only said stuff like, “I like to put together Ikea furniture” and “I’m in love with my dog.” Super sexy and obviously, a major turn on. Let me know if you’d like me to write your dating profile.
I had some great dates with guys I met on OkCupid and that’s how I met the boyfriend. And can I just say that I hate the word “boyfriend.” It makes me feel like a dumb teenager. F*ck, we need to invent a new word for that. And I don’t like partner or lover (f*cking gross), either. Manfriend? No. Please tell me there’s a better word.
I wish I had some pictures I could include from my dates, but I’m not that psycho. However, I recently came across this picture of my grandparents and I love it! I’m sure they would have been
appalled thrilled to hear my dating stories!
I’ll have more pictures in my next post because I’ll be writing about my favorite thing…TRAVEL!